Swing Batter Batter...

Holy curve ball life! Just when I start to feel as if most parts of my life are falling in to place and I am happy with most things, a wicked curve ball is thrown at me and I am not sure if I should swing or let the damn thing hit me or duck out of its way. This could not come at a more crucial point when I am 11 days out and about to compete in the biggest show yet. I was leaving the gym yesterday after a good chest work out with BC and Batman, when I read over a very unexpected email and almost walked head on into a light pole. I re-read it again in my car and started to feel overwhelmed with emotions and yep you guessed it, I started to cry because I don't know what I am to do. (Well and I am dieting, carb depleted and not to mention plain ol' exhausted!) After trying to wrap my head around things, I did what I usually do and called my mom for advice. We didn't decide anything except I told my mom that God is testing me and trying to show me something, yet I am not sure what and why he is doing it right now. The timing of it all just seems too much but if there is one thing I do know.....I am tough and I will get through this! I am a fighter. I am full of fire (I am reminded of this a lot lately by the boys in the gym because I am a little firecracker especially when I am hungry) and no matter what I decide to do, I know God will be there by my side all the way through. I just need to put my faith in him and hold on.

As I mentioned, I am 11 days out. Yes sir.... 11 more days until I am on stage again but that is just the start. After that, I have two days to collect myself, prep food, pack for a week long adventure, and head out to the biggest show yet. Oh my goodness, I get chills every time I think about it! I have an amazing group of people that I am going down with as well as amazing friends that will be there when showtime rolls around. I was talking with A.J. last night and she was saying all the right things because after I got off the phone, I felt a lot better and I was no longer as scared but more excited. Every day is different as showtime gets closer because my diet is changing, my water intake is changing, my body is feeling different (some times good and some times not soo good), and my emotions are on a six-flags roller coaster. I do owe a huge huge thank you to all of you who are by my side right now and until stepping foot on stage! I know that sometimes I am grumpy, a little spitfire full of fiestyness, and sometimes down right a pain in the ass but with out you, I do not know how I would get through some of the things I do. Especially when you join me for cardio (Mr. T, Robin, and Batman!) when you absolutely do not have too. It means the world to me!

Ciao for now,     J