Adjustments Adjustments...

I have been waiting for this Tuesday to arrive for many different reasons! First of all, I completed my last 3:30 am cardio for the next week and a half! Woot I made it through! Second, I leave in T-minus 2 days for Las Vegas with my mom and sister...Soo excited! I was talking to my mom yesterday and trying to figure out all my food prep, packing, suitcase dilemma (yes I am a girl and I lug a lot of stuff, especially shoes and my WHOLE family can attest to this! I once made my brother pack 3 pairs of heels in his suitcase from Mexico home). So I asked if we had a fridge in the room and she said she would call and check on it. I got an email this morning from her that says:

"I called Mirage & found out we just had a minibar fridge but could request one for $25.00 a day, unless it was for a medical reasons then it would be free. I explained the situation and he said that was close enough to a medical reason. LOL :) So we have a regular fridge. MOM"



I just love you to the moon and back mom! You rock! I loved this email soo much, I printed it and I am going to put it on my fridge! The next couple days are going to be crazy crazy! I have to get laundry done, clothes packed, food prepped, Pete and a Pete workout in (eeeek), all the normal running around, a few more cardio's, appointments here and there. Welcome to the life of a busy busy competitor who is about 4 and 5 weeks out. This past weekend was busy as well and on Friday I saw a chiropractor for the first time in a while. Dr. J is pretty rad and he has plans to get me all fixed up. When I say fixed, I literally mean repair my poor skeleton. Ha I had x-rays taken on Friday and I could not believe what I saw. My right hip is a solid 3 inches higher than my left as is my right shoulder. Now this totally explains the weird alien formation I have on my right quad. I showed it to Pete one day and said, "WHAT. IS. THIS.?" He looked at me as he normally does, a nonchalant glance (LOL) and says my hips were off. Well you were right once again Pete and now its time to get the weird lump outta here! I now have a set schedule of cracking, muscle therapy, adjusting, massaging, basically if I was a car, I would be getting the 'works' detail every time I head in to see Dr. J. I love it but man am I sore! I met with some girlfriends over the weekend for some QT and shopping and we have concluded that shopping should be considered cardio, now all we gotta do is convince Pete that it is. I was exhausted after shopping and the last thing I wanted to do was go in for my second cardio but ya know what....I did it and I did it with everything I had. I got through that cardio and was dang proud of myself for pushing through it. Speaking of pushing through, yesterday I did quads with Mr. T and Jr and it was a fun one to watch. Fun for the fact that I opened up a new world of training for those two and I am pretty sure they may be feeling it this morning. Not gonna lie...I was doing just as much weight as them on some things but shhhh don't tell them! :) Jr had walked to get a drink and came back with a HUGE grin on his face saying that his legs gave out and he almost fell into someone. That kid has the biggest heart and I really enjoy lifting with him. He has taught me that just "a couple more" really means 5 or 6 and there is no "should" only "Lets do it!". I then had 2nd cardio to do and both of them looked at me in disgust and said, "you are really going to go run right now?" Well Duh, of course I am...I owned that cardio and afterwards when Mr. T said my determination is unbelievable, I knew I had done work. Enjoy the beautiful day!

Ciao for now,   J

Fuel For Fire...

"Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing. Use the pain as fuel, as a reminder of your strength."

I really like this quote and when I read it, it hit home on more levels than one. I was thinking a lot about the next 5 weeks and starting to stress out about what is to come before the next competition. I have determined that although I do everything possible to make sure things are 100% in diet, training, my relationships, ect. life can throw you curve balls and instead of getting upset and dwelling on those things, I need to laugh them off, determine how to handle what is at hand and move forward. I will wrestle my demons and let those sweet angels sing, for they have something beautiful to say. I told Mr. T last night when I was talking about all the things that have come down on me and stressed me out this week that "I am perfectly imperfect." I like to think that I can control everything in my life but we all know this is soo far from the truth! If I could...It would always always be warm and sunny, I would have won the Lotto by now (maybe a couple times), big sweatshirts and messy hair would be sexy, brownies would be on EVERY meal plan, and double cardios would be outta style! :) Really though...I know that I am in control of myself and myself only and that is what is important. I need to laugh at the little things and let them slide off my back not only because they are just that, little, but also because there will be a time when bigger things happen and I really will have to worry. This morning is an example of learning to let go and move on. I was merging on to the freeway at 345 am when a trucker did not move over to let me on. Even though I was a little bit a head of him as I was merging on, he did not move into the other lane so I had to slam on my brakes and let this double semi go by...Well I had a cup of coffee between my legs and it spilled, not just on my floor mats but all over my lap. I was soo angry and could not believe that this just happened especially when my yoga pants are sopping wet with hot coffee...not pleasant! I looked up and saw an almost full moon and instead of yelling like I wanted too, I just laughed because there was nothing else I could do. It had already happened and I still had cardio to do. I couldn't let this ruin my cardio! I will say however, I listened to some pretty hard rock and ran faster than I normally do at 4 am. So in a way...Thanks you dang trucker for making me work harder this morning!

Yesterday my mom came with me and had a "Pete Day"! I am soo excited for her to start a program with him and she will also be starting her training for a 10k. I can not wait to help in anyway that I can and that means I may have just gained a new cheat meal partner and cardio buddy! We even have matching shoes..LOL

Happy Friday! 

J

My Hero... My Dad!

This weekend is Fathers Day and I want to wish all you dads a happy day! Whether you have been a dad for many years, are about to be a papa for the first time or are a proud daddy of a four-legged furry kid, you all deserve to be loved and appreciated for all that you do! This post is dedicated to my hero... My dad!

He is the most amazing man in the world. He is my confidant, my friend, my crutch, my everything and I do not know where I would be with out him by my side. He is and always will be the number one man in my life and I know with out a doubt that if ever I fall, he will be there to pick me up, skinned knees and all. From the earliest days he has been encouraging me to become anything I want to be as long as it makes me happy. One of my favorite stories with my dad is from the Christmas of Third grade. I opened a few presents of brushes and horse books among other "horse things." The last present he handed me was a wrapped shoe box and I still remember the smirk that spread across his mustached face! I unwrapped the box and opened it only to find horse poop! Yep ya heard me...Horse poop for Christmas. I had no idea why I was getting poo for a present until the next morning when he brought me Maggie Mae, the greatest pony on earth, all his scheming made sense! He put me high on my 1st pony when I was too little to climb up on my own, he hauled me to every dang 4-H or Pony Club show in the Northwest with a smile on his face and sat there watching patiently. Little does he know I have been watching him in admiration for years and I will never be able to tell him how much he means to me nor will I ever be able to describe how much I love him. My dad has picked up the pieces when everything shattered at once, he has been there, no questions asked, when I needed help out of a sticky situation, and he has pushed me when I felt like giving up and throwing in the towel. I have watched my dad work his butt off for his family and never complain about it nor give up when times got a little rocky. I am proud to say I am like my dad for I have his drive and determination and his Type-A personality (never thought I would say I'm proud of this but...). I love the way my dad will call out of the blue because he is driving somewhere and just wants to check in and even though my mom and sister will agree, my dad will never ever let you go hungry! Especially if you are at the house and he is making Spaghetti and meatballs! :) I remember baking my dad something when I was about 14 and it was taking FOREVER and he looked at me and said, "Great things take time Jamey. You took 9 months." Everytime I think about this, my eyes begin to well up with tears. Thank you dad for everything! Thank you for being my rock when I needed to be strong. Thank you for being my leader when I needed guidance. Thank you for my friend when everyone else walked out on me. Thank you for funding my many expensive hobbies :) Thank you for giving me everything I have and making me into what I am today. I am a strong healthy independent woman wishing for the world and chasing her dreams because of you. You have allowed me to spread my wings and fly. Thank you. I love you!

J

Woohoo...One Hundred!

Wish I could have a bite!! LOL

I just noticed that this is my 100th post. Wow, I have really posted 99 other entries about my life and journey as a figure competitor? I remember when I first announced to Batman and Robin that I was going to start a blog and all Batman said was, "Is it going to be a blog where you rant about all the things that happen in the gym?" Well excuse me Mr. Negativity but no, it is not! ;) Although that does lead me into my topic for today...Gym Etiquette! Ugh! Ok so I wonder what some peoples houses look like if they treat it anything like they do the gym. Yesterday I had just finished up with my cardio and walked over to the water fountains, now I normally don't drink out of them but I was soo thirsty. One was being used by a mohawked guy filling up his water bottle and the other one was occupied by a really tall dude. As I'm standing there waiting for one to open up, I notice that the tall dude takes a sip and then spits into the edge of the drinking fountain. He then repeats this sip and spit again before walking off. This is disgusting! There was no way I was going to drink from that water fountain  especially when I get closer and notice that there is a huge wad of spit in the corner just chilling. Nasty! I then walked into the locker room to get my bag and switch clothes when I notice this woman about to leave. She had just used the hair dryer or something but she cleaned out her brush and left the wad of hair on the counter. Between this and the spit, I almost tossed my cookies (well ok it would have been tilapia but same same). Yuck really?! The last thing I will mention and I have no idea if they can not smell themselves but deodorant was created for a reason! So was soap...I love this quote, "Motivation doesn't last but neither does bathing, that's why it's recommended daily!" Come on people, its called hygiene! Ok enough ranting (Happy Batman??)

It was a shoulder day (one of my favorites) and we smoked through the workout. My shoulders are starting too look good and I am happy with the way they are staying full. I have changed up my training a little bit and took some advice from Mr. Olympia on set and reps which has made a difference. I am still pushing heavy heavy weight but then changing it up to throw a few curve balls in. Today is another day of training and dieting and I am looking forward to more cheesecake tonight! I made it through round one of cardio and am actually looking forward to round two. I will say that it made my day when I walked in to grab my morning coffee at Starbucks and the guy behind the counter handed me my drip with a splash of nonfat already to go before I had time to say "Good Morning." He is such a cutie and it totally turned my day around! Here's to another day and my wish for yall is to make someones day a little brighter by a random act of kindness. I will follow up tomorrow and see how it went! :)

Ciao for now,      J

Have You Seen My Gum?

I made it through Monday in one piece! It was actually a good day and I ended up lifting with B.C. We did quads and calves and I do not think in all of my days, I have burned out my quads like I did yesterday. It was a quick, productive workout and I topped it off with the Stepmill. Now I really feel bad for the lady next to me because I had sweat flying all over the place. I have discovered this T.V. show that I downloaded onto my I-pod and it has successfully helped me kill three sessions of cardio to-date. I stumbled across it one day and decided to give it a try. It plays good music in between scenes but is plain ol' interesting and if it makes my cardio go quicker, I am all about it! Now this is embarrassing... I was going to town on the Stepmill yesterday and I was chewing my gum and watching my show. (I have to have gum when I work out! Its just not the same with out it). Anyways, I was trying to blow a bubble or something when my gum slipped out of my mouth and dropped...well somewhere! I couldn't find it and I was frantically looking all over the place just to make sure it didn't land on the woman below me on the Treadmill! She gave me a weird look and asked, "Did you drop something?" I just smiled and kept going but in my head I was freaking out a little. I finished my time and as I was wiping down my machine, I was still searching for this piece of gum. I COULD NOT find it for the life of me. As I washed my hands and cleaned up before leaving, I noticed this blue piece of gum on the strap of my tank top. Thankfully it was on me and not in the woman's hair or something! Note to self: do not attempt to blow bubbles when you are huffing and puffing up the stairs. I raced home to get some food prep done and accomplished 3 days worth of meals along with 2 loads of laundry, dishes loaded, run, and unloaded, and organized the kitchen. The newest development around my place is it is now common to find Stella climbing in the shower, which she assumes is her personal watering hole. She will not drink out of her bowl and she actually plugged the drain on her own to save some water! Oh boy, sometimes...

I have to say I think I surprise others especially when it comes to food and eating. I had a modi cheat meal over the weekend and it included cheesecake. If you know anything about me, you know that I am a sweets girl to the core! I loooooove me some sweets! I just bought plain ol' cheesecake but I topped it with sugar-free Carmel sauce, a scoop of Adams peanut butter, M&Ms, and anything else that sounded good! I had a plate that looked like a little kids science experiment but man o man was it delicious! As I was working my way through it, I was shot some glances like, "I cant believe she is eating ALL that!" Don't judge... I am not scared! I had a cheat meal once with an old college friend and as I ordered my burrito and a plate of nachos he just looked at me in disbelief. I still remember him saying, "There is just something about a girl that is not afraid to eat. WOW!" Well I have A.J. to thank for teaching me the proper way to have a cheat meal! :)

Ciao for now,     J

Don't Be Afraid...

"Don't be afraid to give your best at what are seemingly small jobs. Every time you conquer one it makes you that much stronger. If you do the little jobs well, the big ones will tend to take care of themselves."

T.G.I.F! I am soo excited that it is Friday and that the week is drawing to an end. What a long, exhausting week it has been both physically and emotionally. I got a text message from A.J. on Wednesday saying that she was waiting on MRI results to tell if she would need surgery or not and if she did, she would not be competing this summer. I called her yesterday to check in with her and she told me the news...I could not believe what I was hearing and I told her that I will be beside her the entire road back. I will be her crutch when she needs help, her sounding board when she needs to vent, her shoulder to cry on, I will be there and this is just a speed bump but I told her I know she is a fighter and will come back better and stronger. I told my Sweetcheeks the same thing when I saw her on Tuesday, if she needs me, I will be there every step of the way until she is back 110%. I believe in both of you ladies and am blessed to have you in my life. I started a journal for this section of my journey for which I have been recording daily weight, workouts, my diet, quotes, inspirations, fears, you name it. The next 7 weeks are extremely important and I need to be at my best, for this is the biggest competition yet. I know that I can do it, I know that I will keep pushing forward but having this journal with me helps encourage me every time I look at it.

Yesterday was a big shoulder day! I lifted with Mr. T and Jr (the 18 year-old I mentioned) and we got a lot accomplished for being the end of the week. We hit our shoulders hard, ran the rack, and if I asked Jr how many more he always bumped up our numbers by a couple with a huge grin on his face. What I love about shoulders is that in mid lift, you can see all the beautiful muscles that form such an important body part and they just look sexy! Hehe I have always admired the human body and when I see a muscular physique, I stare because I know the hard work it takes to get to that point. Muscle is sexy...Just saying! I topped off the workout with shrugs and hit the treadmill for sprint work. I was hating the first 15minutes or so because my shins were killing me but a song came on my i-pod that had Busta Rhymes spitting some beats and cranked it up and kept going. I had to replay the song about 5 times to get through my run but I did it. The only other thing I kept thinking was "She is not quitting!" (She being my competitor) and as sweat dripped in my eye, I kept pushing. Exhausted from the day, I ate my salmon, asparagus and sweet potatoes, cooked some extra tilapia and hit the sack. I have to say though, I got up and had my first round of cardio done by 4am! Woot woot... Here's to a happy Friday!

Ciao for now,     J

Let Your Light Shine...

Nelson Mandela used this quote in his inaugural speech in 1994 and after discovering it, I had to share it!

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light not our darkness, that frightens us most. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and famous?' Actually, who are you not to be? YOU are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in all of us. And when we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presences automatically liberates others."

I love this! I believe 110% that one person can easily turn the day around for another person. How many times have you seen someone with a smile radiating from their face and smiled yourself because you just couldn't help it? I believe that laughter is infectious and when you see someone glowing with happiness, you can't help but feel better. I also believe that way too many of us (myself included) stop from becoming who we truly want to be because we are scared of what others will think or if they will judge us. I had a conversation yesterday with one of my students that left me feeling full of questions. I see in her that she is screaming to become free. She is wanting to become her true self yet holds back for fear she will disappoint those around her. I explained to her that she has to ultimately make herself happy and do what is best for HER in order to find what she is looking for in life. I know I am guilty of hiding myself from others because showing your dreams and aspirations to others can be down right nerve wracking. But what I have learned (and wish I would have practiced looong ago) is that people are either going to like your or not. So why not allow them to like you for you, your true self? You will find more often than not, that those around you will be more attracted and more apt to wanting to be around you when you are 100% comfortable in your own skin than trying to be someone you are not. Now it has taken me 25 years and many rocky spots to figure this out but I wouldn't have it any other way (Mr. O's favorite saying!) My wish for this student and for all of you trying to find your place in this world is to stick to what you believe in and that should be yourself! 

Yesterday was a crazy but very productive day. It was a leg day and we all know what that means! LOL  I saw a face in the gym that I had not seen in about a week...Robin! The crew was all there but it was a mixed workout for some did legs while others worked shoulders. The intensity and programming behind our leg day changed a tad and when I looked over and saw B.C. AND Robin both laying on the floor, I knew it was going to be a good workout! We plowed through about 6 different lifts all while incorporating plyo's and a run outside to top her off. I felt really good about the workout and had enough energy to make it through my first two-a-day! Soo much energy that Robin insisted I tell him what I was on so he could have some...Well my friend, its a thing called life! :) P.s. Good luck today! Know that B.C., Batman, and I are all thinking about you and the little one. Keep us posted! After the gym I went up to my parent's to get Stella and have some good ol' cheesecake! (Yep back on modi cheats) Chatted with my folks and then hit the road for home to food prep, pack my bags for this morning, do way too many dishes and crawl into bed only to wake up a couple hours later. Oh my goodness... back at it again! I also have to mention that the day was brightened by an unexpected present at my doorstep and it made me smile. Shoot its still making me smile!

Ciao for now,   J

Hmm...How Could I Forget?

"You've got to get up every morning with determination if you're going to go to bed with satisfaction."-George Lorimer

Two-a-day cardios started today and when I was driving in at a quarter to 4 (a.m. that is), I was still wiping the sleep from my eyes. I forgot how early round 1 was but how could I? It wasn't that long ago that I was prepping for my first ever competition. Nailed cardio session one and next came breakfast...Guess what it was?? Yep! Salmon and asparagus at 4:30 am.. Mmmm Delish! Hehe I don't know if I will ever forget about this breakfast of champions. I will admit that getting up, doing cardio followed by a day of fish eating, I feel like my head is more in the game than ever and I am now in full-blown comp mode. Not that I wasn't before, its just now I know what lies ahead of me and I am ready to take it on! I was talking with a friend this weekend, I will call him Mr. T, and I was explaining that even though life gets rough and bad things can happen, I will find a way through, around, or straight up over the top of that problem proving it can not get me down. He said not many people think that way and it is one of my character traits he admires the most. Aww thanks! :) I am hoping Mr. T will compete because if he does, he will kill it! I have had the chance to lift with him a couple times and it has added great variety to my workouts as well as a change of scenery not too mention, he lifts with an 18-year old that is going to be H-U-G-E! This kid has more heart and dedication than many and he is making huge strides in the gym. I did not know him when he first started but what I know now is that if he ever competes, he will be hard to beat...Just give him a couple of years!

I mentioned that I carry pictures of my family around with me yesterday as a reminder that I can do anything I want. This is because I am blessed to have such an amazing family stand behind me through thick and thin, no matter what is going on, I know they will be there 150%. I love each and everyone of them more and more each day and would like to thank them for supporting my dreams and allowing me to follow them as a woman, a daughter, a sister, and a friend. Mom and Dad- I could never ever imagine my life without you and your unconditional love. You have taught me to stand up when ever I fall, smile even through the tears, and love with no boundaries. I hope to be half of what you are too me someday. My broham! Thank you for being there to tell me it's ok when I don't see the light at the end of the tunnel and to make me smile and offering to beat up anyone who is treating me wrong. Def NG! I love you. My seeeestah! My best friend and who would of thought I would be saying that after the time you gave me a concussion?! I love you and am soo dang proud of the woman you are! Thank you for sharing the many cheat meals with me and even more so the delicious brownies AND frosting. Thank you for believing in me and being there when I needed a shoulder to cry on or a friend to snuggle with. P.s. Thanks for being my coffee-run partner-in-crime..I am one blessed girl to come from such a strong family. I love you!

Ciao for now,  J

Remember Who You Are...

Just sometimes I wish I could escape myself and be someone else. This feeling only comes when I have soo much on my plate that it is spilling out all over my new Fergie Pumps (which by the way...Macy's is having a sale on!) It was a Pete Da Man day and it was a good one. I got a good cardio session in as well as talked about the next couple weeks and where I need to be come July. I recieved my new diet and let me say one thing... Tilapia Goo, I did not miss you but you are back and I will happily deal with you! Sweet cheeks met me there and I am thrilled by the accomplishments she achieved as well as how relieved she looked as we parted ways. She sent me a text later today when I was driving home and it brought me to tears (of course). "I could never repay you for your strength and constant vigilance in my life..thank you." It made my heart soo happy to know that she is feeling a lot better on this journey and is now back in action! I had a day in which I had soo much going on in my head and had so many thoughts yet could not put them into words. I wanted, more like needed, to talk to someone, a friend, but I could not form my feelings into words. Much of this I attribute to being physically exhausted and sore but more so that I try and take on the world each and every day, jumping from task to task in order to get everything accomplished. That's the one thing about being a competitor, time management is a MUST! I have to have my planner with me at all times in order to make sure I not only know when I have appointments but also have my TO-DO list, quotes to keep me motivated, and a couple pictures of my family to remind me that I can do anything I put my mind too. The most helpful thing I have learned to do is list out everything I need to accomplish and prioritize it out so I can cross of the "musts" first before moving to the "shoulds." I found this quote and as I read it today, I realized that I had not taken a long, deep breath in who knows how long...

"Next time you're stressed, take a step back, inhale and laugh. Remember who you are and why you're here. You're never given anything in this world that you can't handle. Be strong, be flexible, love yourself, and love others. Always remember, just keep moving forward."

Keep your eyes forward and never look in the rear view mirror unless it is a reminder proving to yourself that you are in fact in a great spot and have fought one heck of a fight to get to where you are. Love yourself more than anything and share your laughter with your loved ones. Laughter can be the best medicine in the toughest of times. Lastly, remember to be strong! You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have. Most importantly... Just keep moving forward.

Ciao for now,    J

What I Have Learned...

Wowza! What a weekend. This was a busy weekend especially Saturday in which I was running around like a chicken with its head cut off from work to the gym for cardio to posing practice to you name it, I was probably there! Posing was a great opportunity to enjoy the sunshine! Since it was soo nice outside, Pete had us (only 2 girls) strutting our stuff outside, clad in bikinis and clear plastic heels. Oh what a sight to see! The boys did the same thing yesterday because I received a text from one of them that said, "Posing practice outside today...bordered by indecent exposure, we got some looks as people drove by." I can only imagine! I had to escape life for a little while so I headed up to hang out with my dad. He always knows how to make me feel better and talk me through many of life's predicaments. I slept for a solid 14 hours only to wake up sorer than ever! I think it was my body's way of telling me that it needs some rest, and since I was nice enough (more like exhausted enough) to let it rest, it was going to utilize every second of it. I got some good workouts in including a chest workout yesterday that left me sorer than heck this morning! Cardio yesterday kicked my bootay for I got almost 5 miles of sprint work in in 30 minutes!

"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."



Life is a journey that throws small pebbles as well as giant rocks at you as you wind along the many twists and turns. I have learned, more recently, that people are stronger than they think, life is just as unpredictable as the weather here in Washington, and it is ok to let your guard down and trust someone with your heart. For someone who is overly independent and prides herself in being strong and who has been hurt in the past, it is tough to let others into my life and let alone my heart. Recently, I have learned that is is ok to let others in and it is ok to lean on someone when you are having a hard time keeping yourself upright. It is also ok to ask for help every now and then, and there is no reason to travel on the journey called life alone. I know when the going gets tough, sometimes life plain ol' sucks! But I also know that if you sit and dwell on all the misfortunes in life, it only escalates the situation and you find yourself feeling worse than before.You also miss out on all the amazing things that are happening around you. Life passes by quickly and if you focus all your energy on the negatives, the positives pass by unnoticed. I had a long talk with Sweetcheeks this weekend and she is having a tough go. I reminded her that she is a courageous, beautiful, amazing woman with a whole sea of opportunities in reach. I told her to keep her head held high as she pushes forward through the storm and sunshine is just a little ways a head. I will stand beside her every step of the way, through the pouring rain and teach her that it is fun to dance in the rain! I believe in her 110% and know she can do anything and everything she wants. She wrote something to me that brought me to tears because she sees something in me that I do not see yet I see it in her... "When I grow up, I hope to be half the woman you are and have your courage, strength, dedication, joy, love, zest for life, passion, and most of all your positive outlook no matter what life gives you. Someday..." I love my friends. I love my family. I will do anything and everything for them.

Ciao for now,    J

Paying The Price

Yesterday was a leg day and let's just say I couldn't tell if Batman wanted to punch me or throw up for what we did. I had the boys sweating (I was more than most workouts as well) and we pretty much looked like we were crazy! (Well crazier than normal) A guy that I see fairly often introduced himself and said he could not believe how hard each and every workout is that he witnesses and he is jealous of the intensity we maintain as a 'crew'. On three different accounts yesterday, people approached me and asked about training and how they can get into shape and one lady even stalked me and a team mate into the locker room with her cell phone in hand trying to get our number to become a training partner. It was flattering but kinda weird at the same time. I topped off leg day with the good ol' stair climber and Batman said, "You really are making up for yesterday aren't you?" LOL yes sir I am! I got to keep my mind focused and my training on par. I can not let up nor will I let the bad days affect the good. I know my competition is out there training their hineys off and so will I. I followed up the gym with a store run, a tanning session, A LOT of food prep (finished 4 days worth), laundry, grad school applications and a little snuggle time with Stella before laying down and falling asleep faster than the paparazzi is to reach Kim Kardashian. Exhausted but a much better day than the previous!

"Happy are those who dream dreams and are ready to pay the price to make them come true."

 -Leon J. Suenes

The quote above has more meaning than I can explain. I was in a full-force conversation with Batman yesterday as I was dripping sweat all over the stair climber and I was explaining what was going on in my life and trying to get to the bottom of why I feel the way I feel. I over analyze everything and it leaves me feeling anxious and unsettled so imagine this journey in which you are working your butt off, trying to get everything done in a day and you still are not content with things or where you are. Its rough and with the help of good friends and a determined mind, it is something that you can work through. I pay the price to make those dreams come true but I also do not know if the dreams I dream are too big or too small, and I often find myself questioning my ability to make them come true. I have yet discovered how to make myself see things through a clear lens versus my stubborn, jaded way of viewing life and the accomplishments as well as downfalls that come with it. I spent some time last night writing all my goals, plans, thoughts, concerns, ect down and feel now that I have a clear brain and can spend time focusing and prioritizing things out. It is time to stop the overanalyzing and rid the unnecessary stress out of my life so that I can be happy and focused in all aspects.

Ciao for now,     J

Life...

"This life is what you make it. No matter what, you're going to mess up sometimes, it's a universal truth. But the good part is you get to decide how you're going to mess it up. People will be your friends. But just remember, some come, some go. The ones that stay with you through everything- they're your true best friends. Don't let go of them. Also remember, sisters make the best friends in the world. Just because you fail once, doesn't mean you're gonna fail at everything. Keep trying, hold on, and always, always believe in yourself. Keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life's a beautiful thing and there's so much to smile about."      

-Marilyn Monroe

What Do You Do??

What do you do when you have a bad day? Some of yall probably do what I normally do and hit the gym to burn off some steam and you feel magically better. Yesterday was one of those days. One of those days that didn't start off bad but by the end of it, I couldn't wait for it to be over! I had the worst training session in the gym in...well I can't remember how long. I had seen Pete and battled traffic back towards the gym for an hour so not only was I getting to the gym at "rush hour" where every piece of equipment was being used, but I had just used all my normal time for lifting sitting in the car with sucky drivers! The boys had already been there and done their thing, which left me to fend for myself. Normally this is a piece of cake and I will just do my thing but for some reason I just could not shake the mood I was in. I started in on my cardio since I really thought it would be the ticket to making me feel better and all it did was make it worse. I got as much cardio in that I could stand (and as long as I could bear the man next to me who smelt like a fish factory) before just leaving and going home. I have no idea what was going on but when I got home and took a shower and sat down on the couch, I felt better. Now I am NOT one to give up and throw in the towel but the gym is my friend, my go-to when I need a pick me up, but if the gym isn't going to help, then sure as heck nothing will! I told myself to not worry about the missed workout and I will make it up as well as come full force today and the rest of the week.

Physically, I am still feeling good but the oddest thing keeps happening. I came into work yesterday and felt great but by the end of the day, my legs felt swollen and cardio hurt. I don't know what is causing my legs to do this but it has got to be something I do at work because over the weekend, I felt awesome and cardio felt like a breeze yet stepping on the treadmill last night felt like I had cement blocks strapped to my feet. It is miserable and it is that skin skin tight feeling where my muscles are growing but my skin is not. This is something that better figure itself out or we will have some words and I just might have to take it out back! I am all fired up and if my dang legs don't start cooperating, I may have to seek out some type of shock therapy or something for them! I hope yall have a good day and Wednesday.....I hope you are better than Tuesday!

Ciao for now,    J